THANK YOU.......

November 27, 2010

To whom it may concern:

Yeah, you knew I was going to right this…..even if you say you not going to read it, I know you will……you can’t help it…..you love drama….you love the animosity…..you love the attention….and since you do, I am going to give it to you…..this may be the hardest letter I ever had to write……and also the one I wanted to write the most….but I need to get this out….if you ever read any of my blogs, you know how much I have struggled with my inner self…..trying to find the balance between good and evil….trying to understand the answers to all the questions I have in my soul……I want to be a better man…….the funny thing is, you don’t know me……you can say you do, but you really have no clue who I am…..and you have truly never tried…..you like living on rumors and assumptions……you’re the epitome of a mirror……you only look at the world as if it revolves around you……so since you want everything to be about you, here goes…….
You are a self-centered and shallow individual……disrespectful, disobedient, distasteful, and disgusting human being…..you are the exact opposite of what God wants us to be……to some people in your life you have a title…..parent, sibling, child, cousin, and spouse…but besides that, they would wish you out of their lives…..you don’t know how much it sickens me to say this…because I love you….I do give you a title and it is by force; not by choice….I have attempted, because of this, to give you the benefit of the doubt….it’s simply not working…..in the eyes of someone outside that bubble of ties, you are a horrible role model……..I think it’s telling that you keep few friends and even fewer relatives in your circle……you have high turnover ratio for a reason……as hard as I try to say this is wrong to be doing, I recognize that you don’t stopped your pit party to listen to anyone else……so this must be done……..
Maybe I am being partial, but I have never seen a worse parent……its hard for me to act grateful for something I had no control over…..sure, abortion is prevalent, but will you forever remind your kids of this fact?.......I sit back and wonder how a person can live with their parent, take care of their parent, and have to listen to their constant nagging and complaining…..and lets be real…its not like you did a lot for your kids when they were growing up……remember you missed your son’s graduation getting dressed?........I didn’t see you at any of your daughter’s functions……any birthday parties?....how about cards?........just for the record, what did you do?......and its not like your kids don’t love you….they just tired of feeling indebted to you…….
You parents died and somehow you made the funeral about you……made me laugh hearing the young folks betting on how long it would take you to cry….truth be told, most your drama probably drove them to a quicker death…..they were healthier when you wasn’t around……and always talking about how bad they did you…are you freaking kidding me??!!!.....they couldn’t do you anyway, your sheisty ass getting them to sign papers they have no clue what they are signing……bills in everybody name…….even had the gall to say your father wasn’t your father AFTER he dead……. Please, let them rest in peace…..you know how we get quiet when you talk?....its not out of respect……everyone know you lying…….its like you are ashamed of yourself…..but in the process, you push everyone away………
The sad part is you don’t see that….you so busy playing the victim that you don’t realize you have a family that loves you……we don’t want you not to be a part of our lives……we just don’t wanna be blamed for your transgressions…..we are all grown and respect is given when respect is earned……be honest with us……act like you are human and you make mistakes……stop with the pride and haughtiness….I prayed God was showing you something during your last tribulation….and maybe he has….but the display you put on today was the final straw for me……funny thing about it, I’m not mad at ya; more hurt than anything……
Some things you just don’t say………there is a fine line for anyone and I don’t believe that once you say certain things, you can go back……because if I had any respect to mankind, I would not say those things…..I am not unmindful that many people will be reading this so I intentionally kept gender, names , and any other reference out of this letter……there are a lot more things we could discuss in this as well and you know it…..you have been a horrible person in my life and I promise I tried….regardless of what you think…..my reason for this is because I honestly don’t believe you have ever allowed someone to tell you about yourself…and that is something we all need…….back to my thought…….you said some things today that you will never be able to take back….and you didn’t say some things that I will always remember……and you cut me deep…..now my soul is fucked up……
I promise I want to hate you right now……when I first read your letter, I wanted to say some things….and I almost put them in here…..ugh!!!........anyway…….you said goodbye forever…and I know even life in prison is only 20 years……or it was….so I do expect you to come back in my life sooner rather than later…..but I will let you have your moment….I will allow you to do the things you said and never speak to me again…..too bad you can’t control that…..
So I guess I can say, I’m kinda thankful today you are out of my life…..you were a drug…..and now I can flush my system and move on….you are actually helping my process in becoming a better person….I don’t feel bad…and I don’t have any regrets…I tried very hard to love you……it sucks you just don’t see it…..

Until We Meet Again,

Spaceship Ohayses